Breathing my Mind into Your Face

It’s Sunday morning. I’ve made coconut banana pancakes and bacon. I plan to make burgers on the grill later. My fifth grader is taking a break from his book report to play Pokemon on the laptop. My third grader is playing one of those free download games on the ipad that interrupt you constantly with advertising or paid game enhancement promotions. They are a dumb waste of time and mind. My wife is reading a book on the couch. I was just asking ChatGPT how to leverage writing skill to make money online. So now I’ve got a 30 day plan to do that. It’s shaping up to be a nice little Sunday. After my oldest is done with his homework we’re going to play some family baseball. Then I’ll watch the Masters and pull for Bryson DeChambeau to win so I can cash my $20 bet. 

Yesterday I did the taxes while everyone else went for a cub scout hike at a state park, GameStop, and 3rd grader’s baseball practice. When they got back, I went for a 3.87 mile run. The kids played on their screens while my wife read a book and napped. Then I went to the grocery store to get the stuff to make burgers for dinner. When I returned, I smoked doobage on the porch then laid on the couch and watched golf. By the time dinner rolled around my wife suggested I do the burgers Sunday and instead heat up a frozen lasagna for dinner to cut down on cleanup. I concurred. After dinner, the kids watched How To Train Your Dragon 3 and mom and I watched “Your Friends and Neighbors” and “The Studio” until she took the kids to bed at 10:30. Since I didn’t take a 2nd Adderall, I was only able to keep my eyes open until 11:30, eventually making it upstairs to bed by 12:30.

I felt the familiar frustration that comes with laziness. Doing nothing has always been the source of my frustration with myself. If I’ve always imagined the great things in my life that would come with harder work and sticktoitiveness, but have never gotten off the couch to do the work, do I really want those things? I must, or else I wouldn’t keep imagining what I should be doing as something different from what I am doing. Watching all this TV would be okay if I was writing reviews about the shows and engaging with an online community about them in order to build a following of people that want to read what I write. I shouldn’t consider myself a good writer if I don’t write more than a recap of my day. Even that I don’t do regularly. But this is the week baby. No weed, a schedule to keep me busy, and prioritization of my tasks baby. This is the week I look back at the end and say, “Fuck yes dude! That’s how you do it baby!”